self esteem

Determining self esteem by self is difficult task in my opinion. Because self esteem in me, varies from time to time or place to place. For instance while I am at home with my relatives and family member I feel more confident to talk to them and share and say I have high self regards of myself. But while I am at work place surrounded with my senior coworkers I would feel shy to say even “how are you all doing”. I think self esteem also varies with place you are living in other words if a person in foreign country than the self esteem is lower than when a person is in home country. Currently, I am away from my home country and I feel my self-esteem is lower than while I was in my country. Despite of given rise and low self-esteem mentioned earlier, I would consider myself with average self-esteem at the current atmosphere. I handle most situations in a very average way.

In my opinion, my current circumstances could be one possible reason for my average self-esteem. As I am away from my home country I feel more awkward more often than before. I am not sure if I understand every situation here the way it should be. For example few weeks ago, I had a car accident because of bad weather. I was issued ticket and summon a court for trial. While I was in court throughout the procedure I was nervous and anxious. The setting and ambience was so alienated to me at that moment. Though I understood the denotative meanings of the words said out there by judges and other employees. Still I was not sure if I understood everything to the standard. I was there puzzled and confused looking for help to understand. I feel I donot completely understand the customs and culture here I feel uncomfortable in mass or group interaction. There is always this fear that makes me feel that I m not doing things right.

Some of the ways to improve my average self-esteem could be expanding my horizon by befriending with more and more people from other countries and United States, exposing myself to some of the group events like community festivals or rallies or parade such as on Independace Days.